Goddamnit.
I got out of bed to fetch the offending offender. I trod through the living room, taking care to mind the obstacle course designed to break my neck: one double stroller, one Graco baby swing, two monkey bouncers, two exersaucers, and a drum that some parents thought would make a fine Christmas gift for a toddler. By this time, the second alarm clock has begun to sputter but softly. By the time I make it back to bed with the initial offender, the second alarm has hit full stride and demands a hit of the snooze button.
Sadie nursed for 10 minutes while Benjamin whined. When I finished nursing her I put her back in her crib and picked up her brother.
It's crazy, but no matter how irritated I get that they're awake at 4 am, I still love the feeling of picking them up and having them nestle into me, half awake and faux hungry, looking for a breast, some love, some warmth. I love these night time feedings. During the day I feed them both at the same time. They lie awkwardly on my nursing pillow and wiggle around a lot. They almost always throw up right after (well, Sadie does. Bless her.) And we're often dodging the hands, feet and head of a well-intentioned, clumsy and over-eager (and sweet omigosh) big sister. But at night, I get to spend ten minutes alone with each of them, lying against me in bed, soft cold little hands curled against me and the soft, steady sound of their little mouths going to town.
By the time I put Benjamin back in bed, Sadie is zonked out, oblivious to me and her brother. Benjamin gave a little whine as I put him down, but that's as far as the protestation went. He fell right asleep.
I, on the other hand, am wide awake now and ready for the day, and it's only 5 am.
And let's be real here. When I can sleep until 6 uninterrupted (mostly), I will be one very happy mama.
No comments:
Post a Comment